The top 5 excuses for failing in goals [the 4th will surprise you]
What are you better at – excuses or results? A very good question…
Still, and without any prejudice whatsoever, we would like to get into how excuses keep people (we were no exception) from achieving their dreams.
It will be great if you can examine in full the nature of your erroneous reasoning, right? And then, perhaps you might find out which of your core beliefs are wrong and which are okay but you resort to them only when it’s convenient.
What makes us behave like that?
It happens either when it is time to act (that is, we procrastinate), or when the going gets really tough while the results are poor (i.e. we cannot register any meaningful progress).
That’s the high time to step out of the comfort zone and identify any of the limiting beliefs that give us the easy way out. Let’s go over these now.
Excuse # 1: “I don’t have the time”
That’s the top one – most common as well as the most harmful.
Not only we all claim that but we are very good at explaining out why it is so. After all, you will never hear anyone say anything like this – “I have all the time in the world for all those things that are important to me.”
Why being short on time is never true?
We all have 24 hours each day and that’s exactly the same number for those who are successful and those who are not. It is simply a matter of how we manage our priorities and efforts throughout the day.
We are sure it happened to you as well. Let’s say you are extremely busy and then there comes up some emergency to upend everything else. And yet, you somehow manage to get on top of it in the end. There is an extremely important lesson to be learned here:
As human beings, we are all preconditioned to deal with uncertainty in a very reactive way. The worry “What is the next challenge that life will throw at us?” is always on our mind. We readily jump in to put out fires making the time while the not so urgent things are pushed to the back-burner. And oftentimes these seemingly low priorities are way more consequential.
Let’s try to re-phrase the issue and look at it from a new angle.
Instead of “I don’t have the time”, let’s think in the line of “I have more important things for today”. That will re-focus the mind away from the idea of being afflicted by “shortness of time” and on the ability to choose freely, aka to control our priorities. Only then the question “How do I meet the rest of my commitments?” can be back your agenda for the day.
How a systematic approach makes things much easier
The “GoalBuddy” system allows us to always stay acutely aware of what is of importance to us and in doing so we can filter out the rest as mere distractions.
This will result in a clear-cut vision for the key aspects of our lives. We got the direction around which we plan and build up every single objective of ours.
As for the weekly steps, we make sure that these small actions are completed no matter what. We review each week what we plan to do and simply act on it without much hesitation or doubt.
And finally, to stay on top of it all (no more claims like “I don’t have the time right now!”) the Goal Buddy is the one person we have the regular talk with.
Excuse # 2: “I have little self-control”
We don’t know how it is with you, but for most of us, the lack of self-discipline is something we deal with every single day. That’s true, especially whenever we have to apply consistency in the effort required in overcoming a given problem.
For example, the two of us are different in this regard. While Niki is quite disciplined, Ivan wouldn’t dare claim the same.
And yet he manages to make progress thanks to his systematic approach that keeps his slacker’s tendencies in check.
A fact of life: Will power can get you only that far
Sooner or later, if you rely only on self-discipline, you will find yourself that it is simply not enough.
Something else is required. First, it is strong reasoning why you want something. Second, it is the framework that allows you to be focused on your actions towards the chosen objective. And last but not least – you badly need support.
How does the Buddy help?
If you plan to exercise after work but then on the way home you make a quick stop at the pub for just one beer then you most likely won’t make it to the gym.
The Goal Buddy will help you keep the promises to the most important person – yourself. That’s what we call a “partner in accountability”.
Something interesting to note here
Until recently, whenever someone had trouble with our system we used to ask them a whole bunch of questions. But now it’s only one thing we are interested in – “Do you have a Goal Buddy and how often you communicate?” It turns out that’s what makes all the difference between success and failure.
Excuse # 3: “I don’t feel I am ready (waiting for the perfect alignment of the stars)”
That’s how the perfectionists justify it. They want to be fully prepared, to have all the information and time so that a detailed plan for any eventuality is in place before anything else.
You can easily guess that life rarely obliges them in that pursuit.
Why is this bad?
It’s crucial to be well prepared. And yet, it might easily transform itself into “analysis-paralysis”. Too much planning will eventually crowd out any specific and productive action.
The one thing that successful people are “rich” in is experience. This, however, doesn’t come cheap and they had to go many times through the trial-and-error process.
Until you dive in, there is no better way to get things moving. You will quickly find the answers to the important questions like “How to get better at doing this” or “What is the most effective way of doing it?” It is our mistakes that are irreplaceable in that regard – not a textbook or a seminar. And the best about this process is that your confidence will inevitably go up.
How does the system help?
It’s quite simple, indeed. It “forces” us to start acting. This first step may be something very small, but it could very well bring in a domino effect that will trigger a series of many other actions. Once you kick it off everything else will click into place.
Excuse # 4: “It’s especially difficult here, in [insert your country]”
Are you afraid that your business will be raided? Does corruption completely de-motivate you? Is everything a matter of political and family connections?
Sure, we are way too good for all that’s wrong and bad with our country.
That’s one of the major reasons for the high percentage of people who emigrate.
Why those types of excuses are going to doom any of your efforts
When one plays the victimhood card too often their perception of life gets heavily skewed towards overarching negativity. But in reality, life here is full of great opportunities for personal as well as business opportunities.
All in all, the country you live in isn’t bad at all for the entrepreneurial types. It is easy to start a new business without much capital and there is comparatively little “red tape” to cut through.
“The grass is always greener on the other side.” It’s a personal choice of how to deal with this, as well as with any other circumstance beyond our reach. Do I play the victim or do I try my best to play the hand dealt?
(It’s a secret but we will say it anyway – the latter choice is the way to the life of your dreams.)
Excuse # 5: “It’s not the right time”
“It’s winter, it’s dark and this cold drizzle outside isn’t quite inviting for a jog in the park.”
“It’s an economic downturn – not the best time to invest in the market.”
“It’s so stressful at work that when I get home I cannot deal with anything else, including my partner’s needs.”
There is only one thing we want to state here:
It is never the “right” time to start acting towards our objectives… unless we have a Goal Buddy right next to us!
To summarize it all:
“I don’t have time, I don’t have the persistence, I’m not prepared, it’s too hard, it’s not the right time…” These are some of the most widely employed ones, but there are many more since we could be quite creative at coming up with new ones.
Would you share with us an excuse that was new and very impressive?
The first step is to reveal what’s hidden in the back of the mind “reasoning”. Then it is up to us how to break free from it. The “GoalBuddy” with its 4 keys for inevitable success is the best thing that can happen for your goal setting. Thank you very much!